"Your biting sarcasm wounds me, Madam..."

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Only 3 days until payday...

But until then....



WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S HAPPY BOUNCING CHECK DAY!!!!!!!!!!


LOOK AT THEM ALL GO!!!!! BOUNCY BOUNCY BOUNCY BOUNCY!!!! WOOOOOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!









This f-ing sucks.

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Monday, September 24, 2007

Something smells like... is that sewage?

I feel like it's about time i got back on the diet wagon. It's been awhile since i've been off, and i think that it probably shows... a little too easily. Yeah.

Since this last dieting post here, i've maybe not followed my own advice and of course, gained back all of the weight i lost the last time i was on Weight Watchers. Evil, evil Weight Watchers... Apparently, i can't help myself from eating all the donuts without thinking about points, or at least looking like i eat whole boxes of donuts. Which i don't by the way. Just to clarify.

So! New plan! This time, i have to get myself together because Cousin G is getting MARRIED. Holy crap, married. They've been dating for like 2 years less than TheBoy and I have been (HELLOOO - save up your stupid money - we're on FOUR YEARS NOW*) and I can't believe it because for my entire life, i thought i would be first to walk down the aisle. And quite frankly, i think she thought so, too.

But alas, just a bridesmaid for now, so i should probably do my duty and at least look half-way decent in the bridesmaid gown. I owe that to her, right? Maybe look better than the bride? Outshine? No?

I kid. Obviously. That would be awful and obnoxious of me and i'm just not that kind of girl. P'shaw. Though, that seems to be the kind of toxic relationship she and i have had for the past 4 years or so, so i don't know if it would be totally out of the question.

But no! I'm not going to be like that, of course! I just want to look nice in a strapless gown, because - i've never ever worn anythign strapless and it kind of scares the crap out of me.

Maybe there's a girl out there that still reads here that will understand. Gah, strapless. Oh, wait, here - let me find a picture of the dress.. it's really not that bad:




















Pretty, right? I mean, for a bridesmaid dress and all. Though the color of the dress will be a dark chocolate brown with the sash being the champagne color of the dress pictured here.

I can guarantee that i will not look as snotty as this model. Nor, as thin. But whatever. She just looks frighteningly pissed off to be at whatever stupid wedding she's in, you know? Like the cesspool backed up in the reception hall or something. Or maybe the groom is her ex-boyfriend and she was asked to be in the wedding party because they KNEW she was going to crash ANYWAY and i mean, she DID give this guy one of her kidneys, so they at least OWED her this. ...Though, she also kind of looks like she gave up a couple of ribs to fit in this dress.

SHE GAVE HIM HER RIBS.

Whatever. It's a nice dress.

And i have to look like her by April 19th.

There.

*TheBoy knows the deal here. If only those things weren't so darn expensive, we'd have been engaged a couple of years ago. Mostly because he's wanted it. Stupid money.

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Wednesday, September 12, 2007

I am anything but preachy.

So after all that shit on Monday, I decided to stay home yesterday and recover from whatever the hell it was that was vexing me. I think it was satan. Or maybe allergies. Hard to tell.

It has been awhile, hasn’t it. And thank you to TwoBusy for pointing that out and placing bets on my next post... Which is precisely why I’m posting today! Spite. It is my greatest motivator.

Things have changed around again at work and I think for the better. After petitioning and a little begging, they’ve moved me back downstairs to the older, homier office space (where the rest of my department is – go figure) and I finally feel like I belong to my new department. I can actually ask my co-workers questions, people who know what I’m talking about rather than just staring at me slack-jawed. Also, it’s much less quiet down here. MUCH less quiet. So I feel a whole lot less conspicuous than I did upstairs in the library-quiet ivory tower of executives. Down here is a little dirtier, a little rowdier, and a whole lot more comfortable.

The problem, though, is that I have less privacy than I did in my cube upstairs, so even though I wasn’t posting much upstairs, it was mostly because I was trying to learn my job. Not because of the spies. Down here, I have a woman sitting across the aisle who can see what I’m doing if she just cocks her head slightly to the side. Not that I think she cares, but I’ve lived in No-Innernets-At-Work fear for far too long to give up the paranoia now. So for now, I will be trying to be all covert-like and sly with my posting. We’ll see how this works out.

Yesterday morning I woke up at the normal time and threw myself at the bathroom and tried to get myself pumped up to take a shower. Instead, I wound up sitting with my eyes closed on the bathroom floor with BigDog, and decided to say ‘fuck that shit’ and get back into bed. I haven’t taken a sick day since July, so I figured I was about due for one. I called in to work and snuggled down with my favorite thing in the whole wide world, my pillow. My sweet, soft,loving pillow who loves me and misses me when I go. Oh, how it misses me and I it. Mmmm… pillow.

As TheBoy was getting ready for work (the sucker), we had MSNBC on the tv and they were talking about the 9/11 memorial that was going to be going on later in the day. I was only half-listening so after TheBoy left, I kept the tv on as background noise and tried to get back to sleep.

While I was drifting in and out of sleep, I’m pretty sure they played the original news footage from 9/11 in its entirety without interruption or commentary from the news people.

If there was any punishment for calling in sick for no good reason, that was it.

Wow, I had some of the most horrific dreams i have ever had. I didn’t see it coming and I woke up in a cold sweat.

I don’t really have much more commentary than that, because as tempted as I am, I don’t want to get into a post-9/11 dissertation that may perhaps ruffle some feathers. I am not a ruffler. I will just say that a few months ago, I did watch the full news footage from that day and it is really incredible to see it all as the events progressed, knowing what we know now. Horrible and frightening, but since we already know what’s coming it is interesting to watch as the speculation unfolds. If you’re feeling strong, I recommend watching it for yourself. And remembering.

That’s all.

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Monday, September 10, 2007

My clothes. They do not match.

A brief IM from this morning with friend, M.

This is how today is going so far... it's only 9:20. I think i'd like to go home now:


8:56 AM M: merning

8:59 AM Claire: mernig

M: how was the weekend

9:00 AM Claire: better than today.

M: oh.

Claire: is for sure.

today is bad.

M: why

Claire: yesterday - good.

today - bad


M: why today - bad , and why yesterday - good

Claire: i have a sneeze from out of nowhere.

my face, there's two big spots.

my eye - has some sort of ouchie in it that i can't find since before i showered this morning.

my clothes. they do not match.

hair is drying half-wildly, also.







i sneezed myself sick, i think. again.


i was just sick.

how can i be sick again?

M: yeah Im sick now too , and with Goldenrod season and the eye problem yea yay

Claire: where's the justice in that?

hmm. allergies.

M: you might have them

flavor.. I has it*

Claire: Allergies. I has it.



*If you're not familiar with the lolcats thing, stay away from them. I love them. And that makes me pathetic. I know.

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