"Your biting sarcasm wounds me, Madam..."

Saturday, November 25, 2006

I guess i'll just post something everyday until i leave.

This is not exactly the most creative post, and is just a meme, and i did just steal it from Suebob instead of being tagged, but that is mostly because i am pretty lazy and don't have much to talk about and should be packing, but instead, catching up with everyone's blog. So there.


1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? Nice hair, you.
2. How much cash do you have on you? None at all, i don't have any pockets in this outfit.
3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR?" Uh... score?
4. Favorite planet? Saturn. It's all ringy.
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone? "Private". I have no idea who this could have been since they didn't leave a message. And i looks like i missed one from friend, S, from yesterday. Shit.
6. What is your favorite ring tone? One that sounds like a phone ringing. Isn't that ca-razy of me? I know.
7. What shirt are you wearing? Pink henley pajama shirt. It's 4:00 and i'm in my PJs. Yes i am.
8. Do you "label" yourself? I am "Lacky".
9. Name the brand of the shoes you're currently wearing? I don't know, they're yellow slippers with butterflies on them.
10. Bright or Dark Room? Bright. I hate working in a poorly lit room.
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you? I don't know her terribly well, but she's got a really great blog, though i've only been reading for a short time.
12. What does your watch look like? It is silver with a rectangular, mother of pearl face. TheBoy got it for me for my birthday last year. Or was it christmas...
13. What were you doing at midnight last night? Watching the first season of Grey's Anatomy. Everyone is right - it's a great show. Silly me for not seeing it sooner.
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say? "I made it to Florida" from an old friend who was moving down there - though he seems to have sent it to his entire phonebook because i had no idea he hadn't already moved and he didn't respond to me saying, "Wha..?"
15. Where is your nearest 7-11? Right around the corner for all of your coffee needs.
16. What's a word that you say a lot? "Sure!" and "Ok" and "Fantastic".
17. Who told you he/she loved you last? TheBoy.
18. Last furry thing you touched? BigDog, whom i'm going to miss just a little when we leave tomorrow.
19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days? I don't think any.
20. How many rolls of film do you need developed? Probably at least 5. I have no idea what's on them, either.
21. Favorite age you have been so far? 16
22. Your worst enemy? Girl at work who thinks she's my boss. Nuh-uh, sister.
23. What is your current desktop picture? Close-up picture pretty much up TheBoy's nose. It makes me giggle a little.
24. What was the last thing you said to someone? See you later.
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be? Million bucks.
26. Do you like someone? Pardon?
27. The last song you listened to? Currently listening to Dead Souls by Joy Division
28. What time of day were you born? 1:00 a.m.
29. What's your favorite number? 27.
30. Where did you live in 1987? Mom's house, Long Island. I was 7.
31. Are you jealous of anyone? Only those more fortunate than myself.
32. Is anyone jealous of you? Doubtful, but probable.
33. Where were you when 9/11 happened? At work, heard the report on the boss's radio.
34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money? Shake it, hit it. Sometimes, in dire situations, stick my hand as far up the slot to retrieve what i wanted in the first place. It only works on certain machines - usually the feminine product ones in the bathroom at work. I mean dire situations when i say it.
35. Do you consider yourself kind? Absolutely.
36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be? Where it would least likely be seen by my mother.
37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be? Spanish or Italian.
38. Would you move for the person you loved? Absolutely
39. Are you touchy feely? Yes.
40. What's your life motto? I never thought i would be HERE.
41. Name three things that you have on you at all times? Keys, atm card. Pants.
42. What's your favourite town/city? Ah, Paris.
43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash? bagels.
44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it? I honestly have no idea. Maybe a postcard from London.
45. Can you change the oil on a car? Sadly, with all the time i spent around my father and brother fixing cars, i never learned. I could tell you have an internal combustion engine works, though. Bah.
46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her? HE is living in Florida with his wife, probably near the friend that moved there, and has 1.5 children and 2 dogs. Bastard.
47. How far back do you know about your ancestry? Great-great grandparents on both sides.
48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy? I'm rarely fancy, but i think it may have been for TheBoy's little cousin's bar mitzvah sometime last year. I did just buy a dress for the cruise, so i'll be fancy some time next week.
49. Does anything hurt on your body right now? My back. Ouchies.
50. Have you been burned by love? Yes, of course. But i think he felt more burned in the end.


And there you have it.
If you'd like to copy this, go ahead. i'm not going to tag anyone because i don't think anyone really appreciates it, anyway.

But, hey! While i'm away, i'll be checking my mail and everything, so comment! Comment for me!! I know you're out there! You, right there! You who reads and never says anything! Do the meme, that's how i'll tag you. Just tell me that you're doing it so i can come and read it. And stalk you from a boat in the Caribbean.

Meanwhile, i'm listening to my first birthday present from TheBoy. Birthday is on Wednesday and he felt the need to give me my presents a little early. He gave me the Gothic Box - A Life Less Lived. Weee! Three cds worth of some really great stuff and a DVD. Who doesn't love a little Sisters of Mercy? Bauhaus? Christian Death? Fields of Nephilim? Anyone? Eh, i do, that's all that counts, it is my birthday present after all, not yours. And if i want to relive my teenage years, i will. Feh. You don't know what good is.

Ok, i guess i should start packing now. I have some laundry to finish up and then figure out what i need for 11 days on a boat.
Have a good two weeks, all! I'll catch up with you sometime in December.
Now where's my sunblock...


Thursday, November 23, 2006

Cyanide Seashell*

I hope everyone had a fantastic Thanksgiving for whatever its worth. Ours was perfectly pleasant at TheBoy's parents house. My mother, grandmother and great-aunt came along, too, which could have been a little scary, but turned out well enough. I didn't stuff myself to the point where i feel absolutely disgusted with myself, so that's good for me.

I thought i would just stop over and put up this picture that TheBoy forwarded to me:


Isn't that beautiful? Yeah... I know. Makes you feel tingly all over, doesn't it..


*The subject of another spam i got. They're getting so interesting.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Just a quick update because I am seriously swamped

I'm trying to do my best to clean up at work before I'm out for 2 weeks (!) so I've been neglecting my blog lately. I have to say that my impending vacation has severely kicked my work ethic into high gear. I have gotten more done in these last two weeks than I think I've done in the last month. Sad, but true.

------------

Sunday I spent the whole day at my grandmothers and then my mother's house.
I spent about 5 hours hanging with grandma, eating lunch, talking (talking, talking - she likes to tell people how lonely she is and how very much ALONE she is and did you notice? She's all ALONE? Nobody calls, she sits around and talks to the walls WHY DON'T YOU CALL ME?) This was supposed to be a quick visit with me picking up the GIANT SUITCASE that she has so I can pack all of my wardrobe for my trip. It was very nice of her to let me borrow it and I haven't seen her in a long while, so of course I was going to spend a couple of hours. What kills me about grandma is that in the same breath, she'll complain about how busy she is everyday and how many people she has to see and how she never feels like she can sit still. So she's all alone, but with all of these other people. I don't get it.

And then I ran to mom's to do some Thanksgiving baking - 4 loaves of Pumpkin Bread (OH MY GOD SO GOOD) and a craptacular Pumpkin Pie. The pie is really bad. I'm not sure what happened there, but bleh. (Really, sweetie, you don't have to eat it - I know you're just being nice).

I brought the pie home with me and left it on the counter to finish cooling. I cut a few pieces and left it sitting there. I walked back into the kitchen later on... and I saw this:

That hole right there, is (strangely) the same size as a small dog's mouth... a Little Dog if you will...

Little Dog is lucky that I'm in a good mood because I'm going away next week. I'm just saying.

Happy Thanksgiving, all...

Friday, November 17, 2006

I'm going to get on that boat if it fricking kills me.

First of all, has anyone switched to the new blogger layout that they keep telling us about? Do we like? Yes? It's beta, so does it do anything weird? No?
Ok.

-----------------------------

This has been a pretty stressful week and I'm ready to follow it up by an even more stressful one. This week, I got my dogs situated in a very convenient, trustworthy place and I'm really, really happy that it worked out because it was going to make me go a little nutty. Once we got that under control, something else popped up on Wednesday night that is still a problem in the process of being resolved and I just hope (please. Please, please, please) that we can get our shit together before I totally go out of my mind, or before we get on the damn boat. Whichever comes first.
I swear, I never thought planning a vacation was going to play such havoc on my nerves. This is just silly.

Wednesday night I was going over some cruise-related stuff with TheBoy and it occurred to me that I'd better figure out where my passport is before I forget about it until the last minute. For some reason, that is one of those things that ends up in a 'safe place' that I can never find again. When I lived at my mothers, I knew exactly where it was and was actually hoping it might still be there. It wasn't, so I had to start turning over the house. I sent TheBoy on the same hunt so that he could find his birth certificate. (Apparently, until January 1, 2007, you can bring a Certified Birth Certificate with a raised seal and your drivers license or your passport and be fine. TheBoy's passport expired in 1986, so is not so useful. Sad.)

With a flash of memory that doesn't come quite often enough, I remembered that I had left both my passport and his birth cert in an little bag that I brought with us last year when we crossed the border to Canada. "Ah ha!" I thought, "here they are, right here with my French/English dictionary". Of course they are. I checked to make sure my passport wasn't expired (it's not) and that his birth certificate was "Certified".

It's not.

HOORAY!! Another problem!!! YAAAAAAYYYYY!

Norwegian Cruise lines will not let him on the boat. No really. All he has is a copy of his birth certificate from microfilm that explicitly says on the bottom "THIS IS NOT A CERTIFIED COPY" so you know, I know it's not certified. Not even a little. And the cruise line doesn't like that. So, either we get a real one, STAT, or I'm going on the boat by myself. ...ahem.. not that I would mind, per se, but you know... *cough*

No! We MUST get one! And quick! On to the NY City Dept of Health... They require 3-5 days for processing and then they ship it out. He ordered for it to be expedited, so the last possible day that we can receive it is the Friday after Thanksgiving. We leave that Sunday. If it does not arrive on Friday, I don't know what we're going to do because that is the last day we can go down to the office in person since they are closed on Saturday and in fact, might even be closed the day after Thanksgiving because hardly anyone is open on Black Friday, why should the government be.

Weeeeeeeeee!!!!!!

Fun and excitement, I am SO HAPPY@!!@*(!))!!!!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Ceramics class is so therapeutic.

Remember this post about the pitcher I made in ceramics? Yes, well. Yesterday in class, I was at the point where I could stop what I was doing to glaze it and finally get one whole project finished. We are in the 3rd month of being in this class and not one of us has totally completed a single project. It is a little unsatisfying.

There's only about 12 glazes to choose from, which may seem like a lot, except that 8 of them are various shades of blue, one of them is clear and the only one that is reddish may be corrupt or the firing instructions mislabled because that huge bowl that someone worked very hard on over there? Turned into a muddy green/black, bubbled piece of shit. Huh. That poor girl is going to be VERY upset when she sees what happened to her work. VERY UPSET. I know i would be.

I'm not complaining about the limited variety of glazes, now, cause that would be obnoxious of me. What I am complaining about is that my professor did not seem very concerned that the three of us who were kneeling in front of our 5 gallon buckets of glaze, elbow deep, trying to mix it with our hands, were really unclear about how his whole thing was supposed to work. She had given us a demonstration, but that was two weeks ago. And I don't think any of us really remembered the 'do's and don'ts' because we were all kind of staring at each other, mumbling things like, "is this right? I don't know..." and "we're supposed to, wha.." and "how do I get it to, uh..."

The easiest way to evenly glaze something is to just dip the whole fucker in the bucket and pull it out quickly and evenly, coating the entire piece. Seems really straight-forward.

My piece? Kind of tall. No fit in bucket. Um... so... uh... what? Do I...? Uh... How...?

I wound up dipping the thing too many times, trying to coat the whole thing in glaze. Not realizing that I had to let each coating dry before I dipped it again, I wound up totally saturating the pot to the point that it was just globbing on the surface and not sinking in. It was drying in layers and then cracking. And then chipping off in clumps. And then there was a little crying. Also some quiet whimpering.

Professor Whatshername was not particularly sympathetic or helpful and told me that after it dries more, I can try to smush the cracks in the glaze closed with my fingers and then paint on more glaze to the parts where it clumped off.

That doesn't work so well for those of you playing along at home.

You know what you do when the glaze goes on shitty? You WASH IT ALL OFF and watch it go down the drain while your classmates watch you and smile sympathetically, trying to soothe your fragile self. Then you can't touch it again for another week because the bisque is saturated with water and won't accept a glaze.
Hooray!

Now, I'm a little concerned that this thing that I worked on for about a month and a half was not washed off thoroughly enough and that there is still some glaze residue lodged in the pores of the bisque. Will this effect how it absorbs it next week? What about the stuff on the inside walls of the pitcher that I couldn't scrub out because i couldn't reach it? All of this and more to be answered next Tuesday night.

Meanwhile, I'm not the only jackass that had trouble. The 3 that were glazing next to me were freaking out, too. One of them particularly, and I don't blame her because her piece was really, really cool and she had something specific in mind for her finished product. However, she didn't have to wash hers off like I did.

Later on, there was a second group of people on the floor that had their arms, elbow-deep, in 5 gallon buckets of crud. The only difference with them? They had the professor's full attention.
What the frick.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Do you want to watch my dogs? Just for a few days? Please?

::UPDATE:: Hooray!! I found someone!!! Our groomer has room and her price is WAY lower than the last place and is within walking distance and i am happy and the dogs will be happy and we are all happy and i can get on with my f-ing life and not have to worry about THEM.
Thank you, groomer lady. You are the bestest.




UGH. It is currently T minus 14 days until I get the fuck off this island and everything is starting to fray just a little bit.
And let me just mention that I'm glad I realized that I would need fucking TICKETS to get on the damn BOAT because let me tell you, I was wondering when they would get here and then I just totally forgot about them. HAHA, wouldn't that have been special. The nice lady from the internet emailed them to me, so at least that's all set.

But the f-ing dogs. Damn.

I had found a girl from a Craigslist ad (yeah, I know. But Craigslist isn't just for prostitution, by the by) who lived locally and was pretty reasonable with her rates. She was charging $15 per dog, per day... that's $360. Yeah, it sounds expensive, right? Compare that to the Doggy Daycare I had left them with for a weekend a while ago: $37 per dog, per day x 12 days = $888

Maybe this is a little silly of me, but I don't think it should cost almost $900 to watch dogs. They're FUCKING DOGS. DOGS. Not CHILDREN, DOGS. No one is paying me fucking $900 and I have to live with these fuckers.

So the Craislist girl had to cancel on me. It was my fault, anyway, and I feel like a total asshole for not confirming with her more quickly. She took another job and doesn't have room for my dogs. Fine. I found another person. She is going to charge me $35 per dog, per day. That's a discount, by the way, for multiple dogs. Isn't that nice of her? For just one, she charges $40. She took a whole $5 off, there, did you see that? Fantastic!

I'm thinking I'm just going to leave the back door open and cut open a 20lb bag of dog food on the floor and let them fend for themselves. LittleDog is smart enough. If she runs out of kibble, she can probably eat a squirrel or something. The BigDog on the other hand. Well, she better learn to conserve.

Cause she's dumb.

On the other hand, there are thousands of people who want to come to my house and let out my dogs and feed them and walk them and make it look like there is someone living there by taking in the mail and turning on lights and stuff. But, um, I don't know how I like that.

But it's not because I think they'll steal something or have a party or anything. Go ahead, really, take whatever you want. It's one less thing to clean. But more so because...

(clicky biggy)
My house is carpeted in this ancient PINK carpet and quite frankly, it's a little embarrassing. I mean, it's fucking PINK. And a STRANGER is going to COME IN TO MY HOUSE.

PINK.


But HOW CUTE is LittleDog as a puppy?? SOO CUTE! Wish I knew her then. No doubt I would have so much more patience for her now if I had. See how she destroyed that towel-rope toy thing and then apparently ROLLED AROUND IN IT? Probably very cute when she was small*.


Do you want to watch my dogs? I'll pay you...


*I kid. LittleDog does not destroy anything anymore, not since she was young. Now she's working on destroying herself.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Okey dokey, then.

I fulfilled my civic duty yesterday and voted. It's always a little weird going to my polling place. I haven't changed my permanent address since I've moved out of my mother's house, so I'm still registered at her address - which is fine, really. I really haven't made the leap to change my address on most of my more important stuff - driver's license, car insurance, passport - so it just means going a little out of my for Election Day. I know I'll get around to changing it, eventually.

Going to our polling place is always how I think it must be living in a small town and you see everyone you know when you go shopping at the local WalMart. You know you're going to see someone you know, no matter what because you grew up in that tiny town and lived there for your whole life.

It's always the same way on Election Day. I get to the local elementary school and scan the gymnasium and oh! there's so and so from high school and there's Mrs. Soandso, my 3rd grade teacher and Mr. and Mrs. Something from around the block - I remember when he helped me up when I wiped out on my bicycle in front of his house. That was nice of him... And so on. It's kind of nice.

I didn't grow up in such a small town, but when your mother is a school teacher in the district you grew up in, you know a lot of people that maybe you wouldn't have normally met. Like ALL OF THE OTHER TEACHERS from the district. And scads of her students from over the years. You may even DATE one of them at some point (completely by accident because you didn't KNOW he was her student when you first met) and then totally regret it later on because Mom knows things. Things about him and his family and she says things like "people don't change as much as you may think". Because even though she knew him at 7 years old, he is exactly the same at 20*.

But this was a post about voting.

I tried to stay up as late as I could to watch the results on TV, celebrated with some chocolate chip cookies when we found that the Dems had won the House, and wound up falling asleep at about 12:30 without knowing what happened in the Senate. Strangely, I woke up this morning feeling kind of like it was Christmas morning; like there was a surprise waiting for me that had arrived during the night. This is maybe a little weird, to feel so excited about a Senate race, but you know. Politics. They can do some strange things to a girl.

But I woke up to find that the jury is still out on the Senate and there may be a messy recount in Virginia and Montana to follow.

There is still hope that things will change out there. And I think we're about due for one. Don't you?



*He didn't share well in the second grade. He still didn't share anything at 20. Bastard. Ahem.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

The best Halloween, like ever.

I meant to post a story about this a few days ago, being that I've already missed Halloween, but since I wrote this e-mail 3 years ago yesterday, I guess it is still within the proper time period. Most of this is, I imagine, hard to understand if you weren't there, but I think it shows a good glimpse of what happened on Halloween 2003 - the best damn Halloween party I have ever been to.

Without getting into too much detail (because I don't know who reads this), the party was right on the beach with a bonfire and everything. It was the warmest Halloween I can ever remember, so all of the obligatory Skimpy Halloween outfits were there (Sexy Nurse, Sexy Maid, Sexy Dead Thing) including mine, The Sexy Witch. I will point out that I was not single, and my boyfriend had declined coming with me to the party. (I would like to state that this was not a relationship worth salvaging before you condemn me). And the host of the party and his band were old friends from high school who I had always wondered 'what if'. If you know what I mean. And I think you do.

----- Original Message -----
From: Claire
To: Previously mentioned on this blog, Cousin G
Sent: Monday, November 03, 2003 10:24 AM
Subject: sigh...

well, welcome to November.

It was an interesting weekend, i'll definitely say that much. I had no idea when we drove up to that party friday night that I would find myself face down in a lawn chair not 5 hours later. And of course I didn't really 'find myself' there, per se, others kind of had to tell me I was there when I was conscious the next morning. Now while I had a good time for the limited time that I was upright and able to form complete sentences, the repercussions of said, "good time" started unfolding as soon as I woke up on the floor on saturday morning:

#1: I am so embarrassed, you have no idea. I need to make a real effort to find N and apologize to him for being the drunken asshole at his party. I went by his work-place on saturday before going to M's to talk to him but he wasn't in yet. damn.

#2: I am very grateful. I actually have some really good friends that were willing to help me and take care of me, even though they were either, a) you know, busy running a party, or b) mostly drunk themselves. So, I thank you, G. Even though you passed out right beside me, you stopped me from throwing up on myself. I appreciate that. I didn't even have vomit in my hair.

#3: It seems I've thrown myself into a bit of drama. I wasn't actually expecting that. And if you don't know what I mean, i'd rather not go into detail in writing. You know - spies.

#4: I am such a sexy beast.


So of course, I've been thinking of nothing but item #3, there. I really need to just forget it ever happened but that's kind of hard. Obviously this means i'm not entirely happy with my current relationship. Ha! You think? I hate self-inflicted drama.
And as I drink this almost-warm orange juice this morning, i'm feeling a little nauseous. Figures they'd have to be out of apple today. damn, damn, damn...

(The orange juice comment? My poison that night was a constant stream of Screwdrivers. Black Screwdrivers, as someone had bought 3 or 4 bottles of Black Vodka. Made the drink kind of a green color... Halloweenie, for sure, but for about a month afterwards I couldn't drink orange juice without getting nauseous and I still stay away from vodka.)


Apparently, if you put together a never ending big red plastic cup of vodka* + Sexy Witch outfit** + unrequited love-interest who's in a band, you find yourself piled into a lawn chair at 11:00 with a bucket next to your head while others are trying to get the raccoons to stay away from eating what's in the bucket. Also, I imagine, from eating your face.

After a few hours of sleeping on the deck, I was lifted from the lawn chair and brought inside where we joined a large puppy-pile of fully clothed people passed out on the floor in the small house on the beach. Everyone was trying to keep warm at around 3:00 in the morning because while it had been really warm around 9:00, the temperature dropped significantly while I had been dreaming of friendly raccoons while sleeping out on the deck.

The drama? While keeping warm and still inebriated, I snuggled up to N , unrequited high school love-interest(also drunk), for some drunken kissing. Bad idea.

Yes, I was dating someone. Yes, I pretty much hated M, the guy I was dating at the time. Yes, I felt like a horrible person the next day, there is no need to tell me that I am. No, N did not know (or, perhaps, care to remember) that I was dating someone. Yes, I obsessed on all of this for weeks and the guilt nearly killed me.

But you know what? What a great fucking party.



*And who do you suppose kept filling it? That would be friend, N.
**When I showed up in the outfit, one of my friends said "look! It's Claire from high school!" Apparently I pulled off the high school goth years well.

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Countdown: 23 days to freedom

Well, a short freedom, anyway. I've been talking about this cruise for months and months now, and it's finally in the home stretch. TheBoy and I leave the Sunday after Thanksgiving for 11 days in the western Caribbean on a boat sailing from New York City.

11 days.

On a boat.

In the sun.

With all kinds of fruity, cold, girly drinks.

Wow, I can't wait. Except now I have all of this detail-related stress like:
Should I pack my own shampoo even though they provide their own? How many bathing suits should I bring? Am I going to get the cruise ticket in the mail or what? How am I going to get myself to the pier? Oh my god, look at how full my credit card is. How the fuck am I going to pay for anything on the damn cruise with a maxed-out credit card oh dear god where did all that money go how have I been charging so much I can't pay that off how the hell am I going to pay that off where did all of those interest charges come from oh my god I'm freaking BROKE.

Stuff like that.
In regards to that credit card issue there, I did the most responsible thing and applied for another credit card to transfer balances over (o% APR, y'know). You can never have too many credit cards, right?

...ur

NO - One credit card is more than I ever, EVER wanted. I hate the things and am scared to death of them. I hate that I have the ones I do and wish I could just pay them all off and cut them up into tiny little pieces and never look at them again.

I didn't even want an ATM card when the bank offered it to me when I was 17. Having unlimited access to my own (pathetic) bank account was too much for me to deal with at the time, knowing that if I wanted cash, I could just GET IT. ANYWHERE at ANYTIME. Scary. Especially when you're working minimum wage at about 15 hours a week and your biggest savings was all of $250.00. I was smart enough to know that giving me a Magic Money Card would have been the death of that $250 and I had better just stick to visiting Linda at the Apple Bank on Friday afternoons to get my weekly money. I wasn't such a dumb kid.

But NOW. Now there's a house with a mortgage and bills. BILLS like I've never seen before like OIL for HEAT which is F-ING expensive and you use things like credit cards for such purchases because otherwise they want CASH and I don't usually have that kind of cash on me, dammit. Nor am I waiting around at home in my robe and slippers for the oil man to come with his delivery.

And HEBREW SCHOOL. For children. Children that aren't mine but need to be Jewish. Because their mother doesn't care one way or another if they're Jewish even though she CONVERTED before she married into a Jewish family so that the children would be Jewish upon arrival. But now that they're divorced, she's not willing to pay for the jewishness anymore. Can't say I blame her, but she SIGNED ON FOR THIS. NOT ME.

Maybe this post became a little more that what I had intended when I sat down to write it. Maybe I should just say, Whoo-Hoo! 23 more days until vacation! Vacation that I've been planning since freaking March! March! 8 months ago! It's about time I get on an F-ing boat already! I! Love! Exclamation Points!