"Your biting sarcasm wounds me, Madam..."

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Keep Pork Off Your Fork*



I am still WAITING. Waiting, waiting, waiting........ I have not yet heard back from Prospective Manager about my essay which is FRANKLY DRIVING ME INSANE.

But it's ok. He is out of state for most of the week at another location, so i'm sure he's busy or whatever. Though he did say that he would email me about it. You know, as in, "Maybe, if i get a chance".

Fine! It's ok! Really! I've already gotten the phone call from HR for an "appointment" to "sit down" and "talk" about my "applying for the position" (do the air-quotes with me, people) on Monday. Which is, *awesome*! Wooo! But also means that i have to tell my supervisor before Friday afternoon that i am leaving him for another department.

A sexier, taller department that makes more money and drives a faster car.

I have two days to break the news and i am so not looking forward to it. I am so terribly non-confrontational that even for something that will be so much better for me, is not enough inspiration for me to leap into his office like a ballerina, scattering rose petals behind me with streamers in my hair, and tell him that i am LEAVING.

This should not be so surprising. Especially to the ex-boyfriends out there who may read this. YOU KNOW HOW I AM. I cannot break up with someone for the life of me, and usually keep it going for waaayy too long because i do not want to break up because that is mean (obviously-dur).

This here is nothing more than a professional break-up only with a deadline and i am creeping quickly to that deadline. I am wishing that i was the kind of person that could do this with the leaping and skipping and ribbons in the hair.

But i am not. And i'm currently making lists of things i should say when i sit down with him that do not include:
"FUCK YOU!!!!" or
"..because it totally sucks here" or
"i'll still be here in spirit" or
"if you'd like, i'll stay for a month or two to help out if you need me".

You know.

*Random 'web clip' in my gmail tool bar today. So catchy.

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  • Another for your list: "...because my feelings for you frighten me." A friend of a friend sent a drunken 'I quit' email to a boss with this kind of tone. Ohhhh dear...

    By Blogger violetforthemoment, at 4/18/2007 4:07 PM  

  • Violet - THAT? oh, too funny. but so very unlikely to come from me to him so we're safe there. but, oh wow...

    By Blogger claire, at 4/18/2007 7:13 PM  

  • I am horrible at this kind of thing as well. Good luck (with both the job things and the pork on your fork - heh).

    By Blogger -R-, at 4/18/2007 10:04 PM  

  • Oh, just give him a blow job and I'm sure he'll get over it.


    By Blogger Da Nator, at 4/18/2007 11:22 PM  

  • I think I am going to have to do the same thing, and I am dreading it too. I don't think it will go well for me.

    By Blogger SUEB0B, at 4/18/2007 11:32 PM  

  • r - heh heh.. pork. is there anyone that is good at this sort of thing? i guess if he was a really horrible person, i wouldn't feel so bad.

    da nator - ur, NO.
    Though, it would probably soften the news, wouldn't it. Hmm...

    suebob - maybe you should go first and then tell me how you did it. i'll take notes.

    By Blogger claire, at 4/19/2007 7:44 AM  

  • oh crap. well, at least do it at the last possible minute so then you won't have that awkward period where you run into each other and know there's nothing to say and there's this big weirdness all hanging there in the air between you.

    *wanders off contemplating floating weirdnesses*

    By Blogger First Nations, at 4/19/2007 12:04 PM  

  • you had me at "keep pork off your fork"

    = ; - )

    By Blogger minijonb, at 4/19/2007 12:15 PM  

  • Man, I so know what you mean I also hate, hate, hate doing the break up chacha with a job. It seems so silly, but I always feel like I'm letting my boss down, even in situations where they knew it was temporary, or they should have known.

    You'll be fine, and also have a much prettier job with more money to keep you busy.

    By Blogger Christine, at 4/19/2007 1:25 PM  

  • As a person in a managerial kind of job myself... I can only agree that my approach to any given subject regarding hiring, firing and discipline would be greatly persuaded by the tactic suggested by da nator.... happy knee-pad shopping!

    By Blogger totallyun-pc, at 4/20/2007 7:06 AM  

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