"Your biting sarcasm wounds me, Madam..."

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Ahem... - UPDATED

So i started to write that thing. You know the thing? The thing for the job? Yeah. I started it last night and uh.. i have to say it is proving to be more challenging than i anticipated. "Challenging"... yeah.

That's a good word, right? Cause i like "challenges". Really, i do. But, uh... I'm starting to feel a little freaked. As if, perhaps, i was maybe wrong about being able to do this. And that maybe i am not quite so smart as i was pretending to be.

I have until Friday to have it finished and I'm wondering if that's actually enough time. I don't even know quite yet how long it has to be, but i tried making an outline (which, not for nothing, i haven't done in an awful long time and i know its necessary for something like this) and i even had trouble with THAT.

So i started on the first draft, figuring that i could come back and fill in the outline once i get in the groove. Maybe the ideas will come to me once i start actually typing something, you know? But then i got stuck in the first paragraph...

I am seriously freaking right now. And I'm not going to go to Prospective Manager and freak all over him, no of course not - that would be suicide. So I'm doing it here. For all of you. Welcome.

OHMYGOD WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING OH GOD OH GOD OH HELL OH GOD. I CAN'T SERIOUSLY DO THIS FOR A LIVING WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO CONSTRUCT A SENTENCE LET ALONE GET THOUGHTS ON PAPER HOLY FRICKING CHRIST WHAT AM I DOING OH GOD OH HELL OH GOD WHY DOES IT SOUNDS LIKE AN ARTICLE NOW? CAN IT SOUND LIKE AN ARTICLE? I DON'T KNOW!!!! BUT IT DOES AND MAYBE I SHOULD PUT SOME RANDOM HAPPY FACES IN THERE YEAH? NOO!!! STOP IT! AUUGGHHGGGGHHHH!!!

Ok, thank you.

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Update - alrighty. I spoke to Potential New Manager and VERY CALMLY as if nothing was bothering me, asked a few simple questions about what i should be doing and i think i've got it all under control now. whooo! just needed to get a little stress out i guess. Sorry about the complete loss of my mind! Really! Everything is just fine now!

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6 Comments:

  • Deep breaths, Claire. Deep, cleansing breaths.

    By Anonymous TwoBusy, at 4/10/2007 3:19 PM  

  • You will be fine. Promise.

    If you can find one online, or at work, try to get your hands on a sample of whatever you are drafting. It will give you some idea of what they're looking for and some sort of format that you'll be able to apply to your draft.

    Best of luck!

    By Blogger Christine, at 4/10/2007 6:22 PM  

  • twobusy - oookay... breathe... yeah, that helps. i think i'll be ok, actually. its been made clear to me that this is just a formality and that i don't need to worry about it.

    christine - i did a bunch of research and found a lot of good information, but a lot of it, i'm not sure how to apply. but it should be fine. i was told that i just need to do a short abstract. oh. hmm. that sounds easier.

    By Blogger claire, at 4/10/2007 7:27 PM  

  • ...I don't know about your situation, but you just saved my red ass from a sinking ship, chickie. THANK YOU!!!!!!!

    i owe you BIGTIME.

    By Blogger First Nations, at 4/11/2007 12:55 PM  

  • I think the freakout gets the thoughts flowing...that's my take on writing. Works every time. :)

    By Blogger Nikol, at 4/12/2007 1:37 PM  

  • Our own minds/imaginations are our worst enemies. :)

    By Blogger aka_Meritt, at 4/13/2007 7:39 AM  

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