"Your biting sarcasm wounds me, Madam..."

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Feeling better today, luckily.

Thank you, everyone who chimed in on my bad day yesterday. I feel a lot better about moving on with my life and getting out of this awful place sometime this year. I really had thought I worked myself into a corner and it's good to know that I'm not right.

In other news, I'm in the second week of my Communications class (Part 2 of a 2 part series: Claire Goes to Summer Session) and even though I was dreading this class, it's really not so bad. Granted, I have to give my first speech on Monday and am totally freaking out, but I think I'll be prepared for it by then. I think it goes without saying that Public Speaking is a dreadful thing and many people, I have learned, really hate to do it - not just me. I even have someone in my class that just about broke down in tears last night when we were given our pop-presentations.

The professor surprised us last night with an index card, randomly selected, stating a generic question. She wanted us to stand up in front of the class with very little preparation and give a brief answer - Public Speaking... eeurrghhh...

In all reality, it wasn't that bad. I was nervous and jittery*, but my question was an easy one: " If you could have the perfect job, what would it be?" Simple. I pulled one out that I had thought of years ago and babbled incoherently about how if I could, I would love to be a columnist for a travel magazine. I totally dig the idea that people send you (gratis) to far away places where you stay in the finest hotel suites and eat perfectly prepared meals, all because these places know that you are going to be writing about them. And from reading some of these magazines, you get sent to places that you wouldn't even imagine vacationing on your own: totally secluded, obscure areas that have the most beautiful beaches, wildlife or whatever their hook is. That sounds great. Would love it.** Review bars and nightlife, meet new and interesting people, see all kinds of STUFF that I would never get to see unless I was independently wealthy. Awesome.

Sadly, it never occurred to me that I could DO such a job. Sure, it sounds like fun, but who actually gets to DO stuff like that? While I was walking back to my seat, Professor asked if that's what my major is in. "Ur, no... um," She, "Any reason? Come talk to me about it in my office. We'll see what we can do for you. There's no reason why you can't do that." And of course, I say, "but I don't think my writing would be up to par for that. Journalism classes sound just awful to me," etc. She hushed me and just told me to see her later.

But why couldn't I? I would just have to work on it. I can take writing, grammar, journalism classes and just work at my writing, dammit. I still have to pick a school for my 4-year degree and actually settle on a major. This here, is the time I can do this floundering until I make up my mind. I don't have much time, but while I'm just a Liberal Arts major, this is the time to figure it out.

So I'm going to talk to her. I'll see what she has to say, and maybe I'll just go for it. Before I started writing in this blog, I never would have thought that I could do something like that. I mean I hate writing. Or at least I thought I did. Obviously, I can't hate it very much if I'm doing this at least twice a week (mostly, shut up). Maybe I can do that.

In the meantime, I'll find a different job that won't make me want to kill myself (or at least won't make me have days like yesterday) and plod along until I finish school.

I'll probably have to learn Spanish, too... would like to spend time in the Caribbean, I think...

*In case you can't tell (ha!), I'm a shy, insecure girl, with a poor self-image and a good case of stumbling over words, rambling and mumbling. When presented with a group of strangers to speak in front of, throw in some dry-mouth.

**I do know that The Boy nor I would not be too happy if my job was to not be with him 300+ days out of the year. This is a problem. Unless I make so much money, he can come with me whenever we want. Kevin Federline-like. Boy has started working on his rap lyrics.


  • well go you!!
    need a photog?

    By Anonymous anon M, at 7/13/2006 3:33 PM  

  • Boobala head...go get yourself your dream! And if you need a personal assistant, you know who to call. Or travling companion. Or cohort.

    I have always wanted to write. Even had poetry published. But I dunno what kind of writer I want to be. Poetry is dead...no pun intended. And I am not one for seriousness journilism, such as war-reporter.

    But go be travel reporter extroidneer! And you are a wonderful kind, fun, generous person....I keep tell you that.

    By Blogger Orelinde_03, at 7/13/2006 3:47 PM  

  • Rachael Ray has my dream job ($40 a Day and Tasty Travels). She just travels and eats, travels and eats...

    Sigh... Mmmmm...

    By Blogger Jessica, at 7/14/2006 10:59 AM  

  • Amen, AMEN.

    Why can't you? Why not? You totally can. I mean, C, there are so many options out there for writing, and honestly, if you're just starting out, there is absolutely NO REASON why you shouldn't.

    None. I'm going to stay on top of you like your professor for this one.

    By Anonymous jonniker, at 7/14/2006 1:14 PM  

  • anon m - sure! except, you know, the magazine would probably provide that...

    orelinde - thank you, bubby, i appreciate your kind words. as long as we can both get out of here, we'll be fine.

    jessica - that sounds wonderful, doesn't it? how does she stay so little, you think?

    jonniker - *sheepish* okay, mom... i'll do it...
    :) yeah, that's what i'm thinking, too. thank you for promising to kick my ass, though. I'm sure i'll need that from all angles. seriously!

    By Blogger claire, at 7/14/2006 3:06 PM  

  • not too damn bad!
    i majored in public speaking in high school. they gave me the assignment, i got the card, i went up in front of the room and I FROZE for the first and only time in my life.
    you, on the other hand, got a line to a possible new future! right on!

    By Blogger First Nations, at 7/14/2006 8:12 PM  

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