"Your biting sarcasm wounds me, Madam..."

Friday, July 28, 2006

Bird Dog the Bird Killer.

As i was driving home from school last night, i called the boy to let him know i was on my way home. He says to me, "um, before you come in the house, can you pick up the garbage bag i flung over the fence from the back yard and put it in the trash?"

Me: "why did you fling a bag of garbage over the fence?"

Boy: "your sweet, lovable Dog killed a bird and i had to get rid of it."

Me: "what?! Oh... oh, no... not BigDog... she didn't.."

Boy: "and i had to pry it out of her mouth because she wouldn't let go. she kept taking off when i got close so i grabbed her and opened up her mouth so she would drop it."

Me: "eech that's terrible. our sweet dog, a killer. was she uh... was she chewing it or just holding it?"

Boy: "i'm pretty sure she was chewing on it"

Me: "oh, gross."

So i got home, found the bag in question and gingerly dumped it in the garbage can. I went inside and said hello while The Boy went through the story. We both had kind of disturbed looks on our faces and i was pretty grossed out by the end of it.

Boy: "she sort of had the two legs sticking straight out of her mouth, though..."

Me: "...*snicker*...*snort*....really?"


I only have 1 week left in my Communications class and i have to say that i had been dreading that class for the past 4 years and finally waited until the 2nd to last semester i'm at that school. I STILL dread going there every day, but when i'm actually sitting in the class it's actually a lot of fun. Humiliating, stupid fun, but fun none the less. She makes us do these really childish, inane activities and games and when she's explaining what we're going to do, i get this giant knot in my stomach but by the time i'm actually immersed in it, it's a lot of fun. Last night was "show and tell". Yes, yes it was. I know. She said, "what's college without show and tell?" Sure, i thought, that's what's been missing from my college career.

Twice we've gone outside (where other people can SEE us, GAHH.) to play games, one of which was a variation of "Never, Have I Ever", everyone's favorite college-drinking game, which got interesting at times. Someone stood in the middle of the circle and tried, "never have i ever... been arrested" and there were actually a few people who admitted to being arrested, one of which was the professor.

Super, i thought.

Before the class ends next Thursday, i have to write another paper, give another speech and take the final and then i'm fucking done until September 19th.



  • cougqI do not envy The Boy for having to rescue the carcass from Big Dog. All I know is that Pooka and Cro`i have been DRINKING from their fish's bowl...and I am starting to get nervous. Because if I find any dead fish 'glued' to the floor I'll vomit.

    As for Big Dog...is this going to become a habit, do you think?

    By Blogger Orelinde_03, at 7/28/2006 11:29 AM  

  • Yesterday was Big Dog's best day EVER.

    Dog would love, more than anything, to present me with a dead squirrel.

    By Anonymous Whinger, at 7/28/2006 1:22 PM  

  • A dog will hunt... and she was presenting you and the boy a trophy... you should be honored

    By Blogger minijonb, at 7/28/2006 2:03 PM  

  • orelinde - that would be gross. maybe you should find some kind of lid for the fishies?
    this has been the second time they've gotten a bird... i'm hoping its the last.

    whinger - I'm sure she enjoyed herself immensely. Can Dog catch a squirrel? I would be very impressed with that..

    minijonb - if she wanted to present it as a trophy, then she damn well should have DROPPED it. silly Dog...

    By Blogger claire, at 7/28/2006 5:41 PM  

  • my girldog used to be able to snatch a bird on the wind from the air in one leap. provided it was flying low, of course. i never had the heart to take her prize away. not many dogs can fly.

    By Blogger First Nations, at 7/31/2006 1:05 PM  

  • Wow for BigDog...all the dogs I've ever had were too stupid, slow, or just lacked the interest...

    By Blogger Christine, at 8/01/2006 8:44 AM  

  • Dead animals are so not my thing. Although - I do have to say that I found two squirrel legs laying on the front sidewalk recently. Very skinny little things, no blood, snapped cleanly at the joint. I immediately looked up, hoping to see the large predator bird that surely did the damage flying around. No luck. Nicely trimmed though they were, I still had to have The Man pick them up and dispose of them. SO he throws them into the street. ::sigh::

    By Blogger runemeister, at 8/02/2006 10:59 AM  

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